A Love Letter to the Wounded Woman

Dear wounded woman,

Let me tend to you sweetly. You sometimes blame yourself for the choices you made. You wish you could take them back and make different ones. 

The regret you feel is not what others think it is. It’s not that you changed your mind about something you consented to. What you regret is that you trusted them to begin with. You regret going there at all. You regret not staying home and watching a movie instead. How wonderful that would have been! Boring sounds so great now. Unexciting. Simple. Safe.

It’s OK. You’re going to be OK. I promise you.

I know you often feel shame. You don’t want anyone to know. But what I want you to know is that the shame you feel is not yours. You’re carrying the shame of other people’s actions. Their shame plastered onto you along with their energy that you didn’t ask for.

You’re also picking up on an imprint that has been branded on women across millennia: the notion that a woman can be tarnished. It’s not true and it was never true. It was an instrument of control; the idea of women’s worth being tied to their purity… a purity that could be soiled by another person’s actions.

My sweet dear, you are perfect and held in pure unconditional love. There is nothing that can ever change that. 

Let go of the shame that was never yours to carry. 

Forgive and release yourself for having been on a path that crossed their path. There was no way for you to make a different choice given who you were… given the things you had experienced in your life up to that day. Today, you are a different woman. But this woman here today is not the woman (or girl) you were back then. 

That woman, that younger girl, was in a different place. She had been hurt in the past. She felt a void within herself. She was vulnerable, wanting to be seen and wanting to feel that she mattered. She was more naive than she realized. She was more trusting than discerning. She was innocent to what weak people are capable of doing.

I promise you, you will be OK… and it is going to require you getting up off the ground and start walking into your future. 

It wasn’t your fault that things happened to you, but you do have the power to rise. No one can do that for you. 

Close your eyes and breathe into your heart. Let me hold you as I speak to you now, I’m so sorry they treated you as they did, and I’m so sorry you think it means something about you. Their actions have nothing to do with you. Their actions are a product of their own low self-worth and poor self-concept. I’m so sorry you fell into the path of their pain and their own self-loathing. I’m sorry they trampled you in their unconsciousness. 

You have the power to rise. 

You have the power to restore yourself. 

Nothing and no one can take away your sovereignty and your dignity. Those who try, the shame is on them and it will take them decades or perhaps lifetimes to find grace for themselves again. Do not trouble yourself with them or what happens to them. 

Rise strong and carve your path. Be bold and courageous for yourself and all your sisters. 

You are seen.

You are cherished.

You are worthy.

You are a beautiful daughter of the Divine.

You grace this earth with your presence. 

There is much healing to do so we can all help stop the cycle.

Let’s support each other in our healing and support our sons and brothers so they too can heal and be true brothers to each other.

Let’s continue our sacred work of together creating the humanity that we know in our hearts is possible. We can do this. We are all here with you. There are so many of us and we’ve got your back.

Holding you with all my love,

Morella